Yesterday was a horrible, no good, very bad day.
We all woke up on the wrong side of the bed, Claire was clingy, threw her entire breakfast on the floor, wouldn't let me put her down, got stuck in her high chair, Tyler was cranky, I was cranky, I lost my temper. It.Was.Horrible.
I was getting frustrated with my frustration too. I knew I wasn't responding how I wanted to respond in these situations. All the mantras I found on effective, sensitive parenting that meant so much to me to uphold were somewhere with our good moods. I felt awful. It was just horrible. I don't even know how else to describe it. After a good nap from Claire the day got better, but a cloud hung over me. I felt so guilty for my mood and reactions and for whatever reason was having a really hard time turning it around.
Today is so much better. We all woke up in better moods. Only a minor amount of breakfast was thrown on the floor. A different high chair was used. I was able to calmly handle Claire's minor bout of clinginess with love and understanding.
It is days like that that make me realize how lucky we are that they are so few and far between. It makes me take a step back and remember that in those moments, when I'm doubting myself the most, I am able to act in a loving way. That I am patient. I am capable. We are lucky.
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